adding on to yesterday...

So, I definitely do not hate her. I just have finally realized a LOT of stuff that I was blinded by. For the longest time I have always thought of what I had done wrong. What I could have possibly said to make things this way. Never looking at what could have been wrong that she had done. I never wanted to see that. I still don't. But knowing her she probably blames me or is trying to find other excuses to why it could be me. She always told me what was wrong with me. And each and every time I would try to fix it. I'd tell her that I wouldn't be that way and she would say yeah right. I was blinded by everything because I loved her. I loved her like my sister. She was someone I really cared for. And because I cared so much for her I truly hurt now. I'm stronger than I was but I'm not completely sane again. In a way, I understand now.